Sometimes I just get tired of feeling like this.

Tired.Usually my perspective is more upbeat but occasionally I go through long periods of depression.

I live vicariously through media; mostly books and music nowadays. Anime hasn’t been that good for the last few years (not that there isn’t the occasional gem). I’ve never cared for television and my latest coping mechanism is cute yaoi manga.

I’m always on the inside looking out thanks to the seemingly never-ending list of medical complications I’ve got. This is generally my preference since I’m agoraphobic. But even I have people I adore and get frustrated when it gets in the way of spending time with them.

Presently, the source of my frustration are my memory problems, which as one would expect makes continuing my education difficult. A situation compounded by carpal tunnel syndrome.

Usually when my condition stops me from pursuing one avenue, I simply seek another.But while humans tend to be full of dreams, I’m running out of things I want to dedicate my life to and it’s depressing me to no end.

And of course I have to deal with people who judge me without knowing anything about my situation. These people are intensely annoying as they tend to trigger old wounds.

Honestly, some days I wonder why I bother getting out of bed.

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