And now for a bit of positivity.

Yesterday we carried Gin to the vet. He’s fine. Luckily, his issue seems to be related to how thick and long his undercoat is. Treatment is simple, cat chow and shampoos designed for shedding. He’s probably not going to like having an extra bath day for the week. 

Unfortunately, I also had to see a doctor urgently myself. Apparently, the vaginal issues haven’t been resolved. After doing yet another course of Avelox I found myself seeing another gynecologist. Avelox is supposed to be very effective against Klebsiella bacteria and this time it had no effect outside of intensifying how bad I usually feel. We’ve taken another vaginal swab so now it’s the old waiting for lab results grind. I’ll be intensely annoyed if it’s yet another gut bacteria that made its way to my womb.

Meanwhile, the digestive trouble has gotten worse. I’m seeing visible signs of severe inflammation now so I’m guessing the diagnosis is going to end up being colitis. I’ve no idea how to schedule the next round of tests. Hard to tell which is the most important when they’re all similarly bad.

I’ve exhausted all the current treatment options for fibromyalgia. I am getting some relief from it which I’m considering a win, compared to how bad it was at Christmas last year. I’m a far cry from self sufficiency but I’m hopeful that in the next few years we’ll understand fibromyalgia much better.

Now that I’m allowed to exercise, I’m hoping that my muscle grade will increase enough that I can tolerate extra weight again. 

I am severely depressed right now so it’s hard to focus on how much progress I’ve made health wise this year. I’m extremely grateful to my doctors for the excellent care they’ve given me. I’ve no doubt that without their efforts and those of my darling I’d have done something unfortunate to myself since the first half of this year was brutal. I’d wake up and have to force my joints back into place or screaming because my body was pulling itself apart. I can only imagine how it must be for my darling to witness these episodes.

Here’s to hoping that the upward tick continues into next year.

Advertisements

Thoughts on Skyrim’s latest re-release.

I’ve never gotten into Skyrim. Friends and acquaintances lost their goddamn minds when the game was originally released. I found the game frightfully boring. It was quite the unpopular opinion.

I’ve seen it get re-released multiple times since and everytime I find myself marveling at how few improvements you get for this full AAA pricing.

Apparently the new version is excellent if you’re a console gamer but not so much for PC users who are accustomed to games being gorgeous either by design or modding.

But don’t expect the PS4 mods to be as good as PC mods because apparently you can only use in game assets. 

Oscar Wilde

Calenders mar the sweet simplicity of our lives by reminding us that each day is the anniversary of some perfectly uninteresting event.

I’ve always thought that the idea that every day someone somewhere is celebrating a milestone or just rejoicing at being alive was one of the most meaningful realizations I’ve ever had.

It makes it easier to interact with others more empathetically if you always keep that in the back of your mind.

It’s not always about the triumphs but if you’re having a bad day, kind words or a simple smile can brighten it right up.

Rambling about labels.

I used to identify with the labels I thought would define me, making it easier to communicate or so I thought. Now I’m older I understand that if I take on a label, I’m choosing to associate myself with all the terrible things (as well as the good)  being perpetuated under that banner.

Nowadays the only label I accept is humanitarian. I care about the betterment of those around me and it really doesn’t get more complicated that that. 

I don’t care about political parties that change their tune as soon as they’re elected. Nor do I care to identify by accident of birth or allegiance to one gender. Or religious affiliation.
If I see a minority being attacked I’ll try my best to defend them but I won’t hide the atrocities they commit because it’s to hard to believe that suffering doesn’t automatically ennoble a person.

If I see someone passed out I’ll at least administer first aid or call an ambulance.

I am not unique. I am just human. 

Mixed news this morning at the dentist’s. The bruxism has gotten to the point where I can’t sleep without my mouth guard. However, as that’s all I have to do I consider it a win. The nerves are still damaged but the dentist is fairly certain that I won’t need a root canal since I’m not in that much pain any more. I can chew food again, oh happy day!

Is this my new normal?

My health has been getting worse since the middle of last year. Christmas was difficult, I got my first sprain on Christmas eve. Unfortunately, the strain became chronic and there was a snowball effect. Ending with all my limbs being either strained or partially dislocated before New Years.

It’s never the same issue unfortunately. Some of my doctors have had more success than others. The last problem had to do with muscle/nerves. Which just added to the list of tests and surgeries that need doing. Being in and out of the hospital means that scheduling any of these things far in advance is a waste of time. I’m terrified of making the wrong choice.

One of my friends asked me what my new normal looks like so I’ll address that here. If I want to leave the house I must have a first aid kit on me at all times. Granted, it’s getting bigger as time goes by. These days my kit looks like this:

2016_03_15_08_06_21_ProShot[1].jpg

It’s hard to know when something will go wrong so I plan for as much as I can. Since there’s a chance that this might help someone in a similar position here’s the break down. I’ve got a unilateral ankle stabilizer for the random sprains and spasms. Tramacet for the damage that the spasms leave behind. Lyrica keeps the spasms at bay but it does nothing for the pain. Dolobene gel stops my muscles from developing clots because they’re always tightening. 12 hour Gravol for the constant nausea that the IBS causes and re-hydration salts in case the IBS flares. Brulidine cream helps when my finger tips tear thanks to carpal tunnel. The eyepatch helps with my migraines but not so much for the cluster headaches unfortunately. The inhalers help me when my throat closes up. And allergy meds because you never know what’s in the food available and bees so much goddamned bees!

I still need another ankle stabilizer since both feet have a tendency to sprain at the same time. I’ll need a shoulder stabilizer at some point since I have chronic partial dislocations after getting hit by a car a few years ago.

After I see the neurologist and get the muscle and nerve tests done I should be much closer to normalcy.

Some thoughts on Jurrasic World.

I saw Jurassic World today. I found it rather amazing that there was such uproar over sexism, racism and shoes. I am beginning to despise these review sites and the narrative that they’re trying to spin. I can determine for myself whether something is sexist or racist on my own. After seeing the show I can safely say that none of those claims held water.

That woman was the most annoying female I’ve seen in a movie for a while. She only pulls the stick out of her ass after she totally fails to contain the problem the loose dino posed. She also had no trouble running to the man she spends the first few minutes of the movie talking down to as soon as she has a use for him. Meanwhile his criticisms of her are quite valid and since she does fuck up quite a bit in the first half of the movie I don’t feel its necessary to go into spoiler territory.

As for the shoes they were inappropriate considering the job she had and the terrain she would no doubt be covering. The shoes didn’t bother me, it just added to my initial distaste for her character.

I loved this movie. I loved the dinosaurs and the raptors are my favorite characters. I loved that Chris’ character could be their alpha. To me its just like seeing Jurassic Park the first time. I spent so much time acting like a kid and bouncing around with glee

The kids this time weren’t that bad, the little one’s enthusiasm was infectious.