Frustration abounds.

So my health hasn’t improved much in the last 6 months. Mostly because my crappy immune system kept putting me down every time I started doing okay with working out. Like for instance last week I got gastroenteritis on Tuesday. Which you might recognise as being the day after I started running again.

Life can be such a cruel joke sometimes. Like the compulsion I have to eat starch thanks to my insulin resistance. I suppose addiction is a better word since there’s no better way to describe how I get if I don’t eat starch for a few days.

While I was puking my guts out on Tuesday the gynecologists’ office called to remind me that my 6 month follow up for the PCOS was last Thursday. Long story short. They hasn’t been much change and the reason is lack of exercise. You would not believe how annoyed I was when I heard that. I have been trying so hard for so long but to no avail. I never stay healthy long enough to reap the benefits of the exercise I do when I’m stable. Hell, my last bout of illness lasted 2 months. 2 months of feeling like I was on the brink of death thanks to some side effects among other things. Barely able to move or even stay awake.

How am I supposed to overcome these things? What do I need to do to start feing better? I’m getting to the point where I just can’t care anymore. I’m already severely depressed and the effects of the depression are made worse by the havoc the insulin is causing in my body.

Sigh…maybe now is a good time to find a psychiatrist.

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Argh! Gastro again?! *cries* I wish I could punch my immune system in the chesticles.

On another note, the new shoes are great. My endurance is understandably shot so it will probably take me 18 weeks to finish the c25k program.

I’m just so happy I can run again!